And So I Wait

Psalm 25:1-3 ESV

To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul.
O my God, in you I trust;
let me not be put to shame;
let not my enemies exult over me.
Indeed, none who wait for you shall be put to shame;
they shall be ashamed who are wantonly treacherous.

For the past week I have been going through a trial. I have had the flu. I have had the tiredness (sleepiness), dizziness, headaches, stomach upset, sweats then chills, difficulty concentrating, cough, runny nose, no energy, and congestion in my sinuses and now in my chest and lungs, too.

I have asked for prayer for healing, and I am believing the Lord for healing, but the healing has not yet come, at least not in the way I had hoped.

But, that isn’t the only trial I am facing. There are others, too, so this one is just added on to those that have been ongoing for a very long time. And, being very weak physically right now also renders me emotionally weak, too, which then makes it much harder to deal with these ongoing trials.

But, God is good! All the time! Amen?

And, the sickness is not the only aspect of this trial. For, many years ago the Lord led me to stop taking all medications. I will still use topical ointments for burns and scrapes, but he led me to stop taking drugs (pharmaceuticals), i.e. legal drugs, for my healing of mind and body. I mean he lead me to cease with the stuff that goes into my blood stream and that chemically alters my internal system. No pills or shots, in other words, though I will use anesthesia for surgical procedures for my safety and for the safety of the doctors. Sorry, I may not be explaining this very well.

Basically, the Lord wants me to be dependent on him for my healing and to not use pills or shots to ease my pain and suffering, but to rely on him to ease my pain and suffering or to give me the strength to endure the suffering so that I might learn from the suffering what he wants to teach me while I wait on him for healing.

For, many Americans too quickly run to the doctor for a prescription or to the medicine chest or to other “drugs” of choice like alcohol, chocolate, caffeine drinks, movies, fantasy, etc. in order to lessen the pain. Only sometimes, as I have learned, these remedies or “band-aids” can actually cause more pain and even greater damage. I learned that the hard way. And, I am still growing in this area, too, as the Lord continues to teach me more and more of what he wants for me.

Ok, so the big trial comes into play when a doctor or family member thinks I should take a drug and I refuse, especially if they feel I am at risk of something more serious happening, such as this turning into pneumonia, for example, and I get that. I take that seriously, too. And, I have gone through this many rounds over the years, but I continue to stand my ground. Not only has the Lord said “No,” but I have had too many drugs that did me more damage than good, so no matter what they say, sometimes drugs prescribed for people actually cause their deaths or worse conditions.

So, once again I am faced with having to stand my ground on this issue and being faced with the possibility that someone may try to force the issue. So, the Lord has been encouraging me through his word and through songs to trust him, to wait on him, to be of courage, and to not fear what humans may do to me, but to be still before the Lord and to wait on him.

Be Still

An Original Work / February 29, 2012
Based off Psalm 37 and 46

God’s our refuge and our strength,
An ever-present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear,
Though the mountains fall into the sea.
The Lord Almighty is with us;
God of Jacob is our fortress.
“Be still, and know that I am God;
Exalted I’ll be.”

Trust in the Lord and do good;
And delight yourself in the Lord,
And He will give you your heart’s desires.
Commit your way to the Lord.
Trust in Him and He will do this:
He will make your righteousness shine
Like the dawn, the justice of your
Cause – the noon-day sun.

Be still before the Lord,
And wait patiently for Him; do not fear.
Fretting only leads to evil.
Put your hope in Jesus Christ.
If the Lord delights in your way,
He makes your steps firm and steady.
The Lord upholds you with His hand,
So you will not fall.

Psalm 25:4-5, 10, 14 ESV

Make me to know your ways, O Lord;
teach me your paths.
Lead me in your truth and teach me,
for you are the God of my salvation;
for you I wait all the day long.

All the paths of the Lord are steadfast love and faithfulness,
for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies…
The friendship of the Lord is for those who fear him,
and he makes known to them his covenant.

Like I said, sometimes we have this idea that we must get immediate relief from suffering when God allows suffering in our lives for our good. In fact, Jesus told us that following him means we will go through trials and tribulations which will test our faith. And, we learn in scripture that suffering is for our good that we might share in God’s holiness, that we might learn to rely on God and not on ourselves, and that we might learn patience and perseverance, and develop godly character, etc.

So, it is good for us if we would all learn not to run to the medicine cabinet or to food and drink or to fantasy to try to escape pain and suffering, but if we would, instead, run to our Lord, pray for healing, but be willing to suffer for the sake of his name and for the sake of holiness that we might, by the Spirit, be daily putting to death the flesh and putting on Christ and his love.

So, we need to ask the Lord to show us his ways and his paths for us and not presume that he is ok with us going our own way or solving our own issues. Again, I am still growing in this as the Lord is teaching me more and more of himself and what it means to rely on him completely and not on my own resources.

So, if we want to know the ways of the Lord so that we can walk in them, and if we want to live lives which are committed to him, and if we want to live life his way and not our way, then when he shows us stuff, we need to obey him and do what he says. We need to revere him, and honor him, and not ignore his instructions to us. For, his ways are what are best for us.

Believe Him

An Original Work / July 15, 2013

My heart cries: Lord, won’t You hear me
Seeking You for the answers
To my heartache and questions
I have concerning my life?
Speak, Lord, to me right now.

“Oh, dear one, why don’t you trust Me
With your life’s circumstances?
Give your all on the altar
In submission of your will
To My purpose for you.

“Surrender your life completely
To your Lord and your Savior.
He has all things planned for you
For His glory and honor.
He’ll work all things for good.

“Believe Him. He will fulfill all
Of His promises to you
For your life and your future.
Trust Him. Rest in His love.
He’ll give you peace from above.”

Psalm 25:16-21 ESV

Turn to me and be gracious to me,
for I am lonely and afflicted.
The troubles of my heart are enlarged;
bring me out of my distresses.
Consider my affliction and my trouble,
and forgive all my sins.

Consider how many are my foes,
and with what violent hatred they hate me.
Oh, guard my soul, and deliver me!
Let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you.
May integrity and uprightness preserve me,
for I wait for you.

If we are following Jesus Christ with our lives, and if we are obeying him, and we are doing what he says, and we are following his lead, we are going to knock heads with other humans who think like humans and who think we should do things their way, not God’s way. And, we will have to totally trust our Lord in this and stand our ground even in the face of great opposition. And, sometimes that may mean standing alone, and it will be lonely, too.

But, if we are truly seeking to know God’s ways and to walk in them, we must realize that even many Christians will oppose us, because they are still living to please the flesh, not God, and so they won’t understand. And, so we must be prepared for this so that we don’t cave to pressure to do what the majority might do, but we must remain steadfast in obeying our Lord.

And, we must wait on the Lord and believe him that he has all this under control, and we must not give way to fear. For, if the Lord is leading us a particular direction, he can take care of us. He will work it all out. So, we just need to commit our ways to him, and keep doing what he says, and then trust him with the results. For, truly he knows what is best for us.

Awaken the Dawn

An Original Work / January 15, 2013
Based off Psalm 57 (NIV 1984)

O my God, have mercy on me!
In the Lord, my soul takes refuge.
In the shadow of Your wings, Lord,
I find shelter till the storms pass.
I cry out to my God Most High.
He fulfills His purpose for me.
He sent His Son to die for me,
So I could be saved.

I am in the midst of lions;
Men whose teeth are spears and arrows;
Whose tongues are sharp; words accusing.
They spread a net, my feet to catch.
They dug a pit, in hopes I’d fall.
O God, be exalted o’er all.
Let Your glory shine to all men,
So they may be saved.

Steadfast is my heart, O my God;
I will sing of all Your wonders.
Awake, my soul! Sing praise to God!
Early I will rise and praise Him!
I’ll praise God among the nations;
I will sing among the peoples.
God’s love reaches to the heavens,
So we may be saved.

Thursday, January 17, 2019

7 thoughts on “And So I Wait

  1. I have prayed for strength and that God will perfect your healing. My dad shares same ideology with regards to medications. I don’t so that sometimes is a struggle when we are having conversations about his health. However I do respect his faith and believe and I do imagine him wondering why things aren’t happening as fast as we all want for him too. We will keep praying because God knows how and when to perfect what He has started

    Liked by 1 person

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