Losing Interest in Your Beloved

Revelation 3:14-16 ESV

“And to the angel of the church in Laodicea write: ‘The words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the beginning of God’s creation.

“‘I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth.’”

Suppose you have been engaged to someone for a while, and you are planning to get married one day, but your beloved now seems to have lost interest in you. She never calls anymore. You have to call her. And she doesn’t always answer the phone when you do call. She is no longer interested in doing the things you used to do together. She doesn’t even seem to enjoy your company anymore. How would that make you feel?

Would you be excited now about the prospect of your wedding to her? Would you even be excited anymore about getting together with her? Wouldn’t you begin to feel that she doesn’t care about you anymore, or even that she might now have someone else? And would you now be thinking more along the lines of ending the relationship? And so would you now tell her how you feel and let her know that something needs to change?

Revelation 3:17-18 ESV

“For you say, I am rich, I have prospered, and I need nothing, not realizing that you are wretched, pitiable, poor, blind, and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire, so that you may be rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see.”

So, now you are able to get your fiancé’s attention long enough to sit down and talk with her about “the facts of life.” And so you “lay your cards on the table,” so to speak, i.e. you decide to speak frankly (honestly) with her and you tell her how you feel and what you are seeing about your relationship with her. And you are hoping to reason with her and to help her to see things from your perspective, in the hopes that she will change.

So, you let her know what you need from her in the way of respect, honor, kindness, love, passion, interest, desire, faithfulness, attention, and affection, etc. And you talk frankly with her concerning what a marriage is supposed to look like biblically, and how the two of you are to become one flesh. And you also remind her of all that you have done for her, and how you have laid your life down for her, and how you have been faithful to the relationship and how what you want for her is only for what is best for her.

And since this is to be a biblical marriage, you let her know how you are concerned over her spiritual condition, and so you share with her the truth of the gospel, and that it isn’t just about being forgiven our sins so we can go to heaven one day. You let her know that, by faith in Jesus Christ, she is to die to sin daily and that she is to walk in obedience to the commands of God, in the power of God, and including being the wife to you that she should be.

Revelation 3:19-22 ESV

“Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me. The one who conquers, I will grant him to sit with me on my throne, as I also conquered and sat down with my Father on his throne. He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.”

Now, the point of the parable I shared, extending the first two sections above, is to help us to see things from Jesus’ perspective. It is to help us, hopefully, to feel what he feels. Now, it may not be an exact match in every aspect, but hopefully you were able to put yourself in the shoes of the groom to be with regard to his relationship with the bride to be whose actions speak of lack of any concern or care about the relationship at all.

Now, let me say here that our relationship with Jesus Christ, if it is genuine, is like a Jewish marriage in Bible times. The man and woman who wanted to marry each other made a covenant of marriage, but the marriage was not yet consummated, so it was a lot like our engagement period before marriage. The husband to be then would go and prepare a place for them to live, and when that was ready, he would then come and get her or call for her and they would have the wedding ceremony and feast, and then the marriage would be consummated.

This is not how our salvation is largely being taught today, but it is the picture biblically of our salvation. Jesus right now is preparing a place for us in heaven and one day he is going to return for us who are his by genuine faith in him, provided that we have remained faithful to the covenant of marriage, and we have been walking in obedience to him, and we have not been “sleeping around with other lovers,” i.e. deliberately and habitually sinning against him. And when he takes us to be with him, then our marriage to him will be consummated and our salvation will be complete.

In the meanwhile, we are in a covenant of marriage agreement, which is like an engagement period. So what this means biblically is that our salvation is in process. It is like progressive sanctification. We were saved (past), we are being saved (present) and we will be saved (future) when Jesus returns for his bride, but provided that we have remained faithful to our Lord. So, during this period of time we are to daily be putting the flesh to death, by the Spirit, and we are to be walking in obedience to the Lord, by the Spirit.

So, if you identify here with the bride to be who has lost interest in her beloved, and if you are not being faithful to the covenant, but you are still walking in the ways of the flesh, in the ways of the world, and in sinful rebellion against the Lord, please know what the Scriptures teach. If you do not repent and turn from your sinful practices to now walk in obedience to your Lord (i.e. you don’t conquer), you will not inherit eternal life with God.

But if you do conquer, i.e. if you do repent of your wicked ways, and you do cast off your sinful practices, and now you are following the Lord in obedience to his ways, and if you continue in faithfulness to the Lord until the very end, then you have the hope of eternal life with God. And from now to eternity you will have wonderful communion with your Lord, and you will grow in maturity in your walk of faith, and God will use you to minister his love and grace to others so that they can know Jesus, too. So, be earnest, and repent! And listen to what the Spirit is saying to the churches.

[Jn 8:31-32,51; Jn 14:15-24; Jn 15:1-12; Rom 2:6-8; Gal 6:7-8; Rom 6:1-23; Rom 8:1-14,24; Rom 11:17-24; Rom 13:11; 1 Co 1:18; 1 Co 15:1-2; Col 1:21-23; 2 Tim 2:10-13; Heb 3:6,14-15; Heb 5:9; Heb 9:28; 1 Pet 1:1-5; 2 Pet 1:5-11; 2 Pet 2:20-22; 2 Tim 1:8-9; Matt 7:21-23; 1 Jn 2:3-6,15-17,24-25; 1 Jn 3:4-10,24; 1 Jn 5:2-3; 2 Jn 1:6; Jas 1:21-25; Eph 4:17-24]

Pie Jesu

Songwriter: Andrew Lloyd-Webber

Merciful Jesus,
Pie Jesu,

Who takes away the sins of the world
Qui tollis peccata mundi

Give them rest, grant them rest
Dona eis requiem, dona eis requiem

Lamb of God
Agnus Dei,

Who takes away the sins of the world
Qui tollis peccata mundi

Grant them eternal rest
Dona eis requiem



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