Freedom from Fear

March 1982

Reaching out and finding no one there,
I ran and hid myself, I know not where.
Fear had gripped my heart; I know not why.
I had the feeling as though I wanted to cry.

I talked, but no one listened.
I cried, but no one cared.
I called, but no one answered.
There wasn’t a soul there.

20191220_200500

But, there was one who was there,
Someone who really cared;
Someone who loved me just as I am,
And all my burdens did bear.

That someone was You, Lord.
You loved me so much that You died
On the cross, my sins crucified,
In order that I might become alive.

 

As a child, I received You into my life,20191220_200422
And prayed for forgiveness of sin.
I prayed that simple prayer of faith,
“Lord Jesus, to my heart, come in.”

Through the years I learned more of You,
And to be more like You, I did strive.
The truth of Your words rang out so clear;
To my heart became so alive.

As a child, I yearned to have someone love me,
To hold me close in his arms;
Someone to watch over and protect me;
Someone to keep me from harm;

20191220_200343Someone who understood me,
Who would listen to all of my cares;
Who would put his loving arms around me,
And with me, all my sorrows would share.

That someone was You, Lord –20191220_200220
“A man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.”
When I put my faith and trust in You,
It was then I was able to find relief.

We’ve been through so much, Lord,
You and I.
If I had not You,
I would have wanted to die.

But You were always there.
You never left my side.
Your comfort and encouragement came,
As in You I did abide.

20191220_200032

But what about the others?
They did not love me as You did.
They did not fully understand me,
And so from them I hid.

I hid behind a wall of fear;
The fear that they would reject me;
The fear that they did not see me as I really am;
The fear that they did not love me.

 

That wall of fear then became
So much a part of my life,
That I was not even aware of its presence,
And it caused me so much strife.

I wanted so much to be used of God
To help in the lives of others;
To help them to grow and mature,
Because they were my sisters and brothers.

I wanted so much for them to see
The love of Christ in me;
To see how much I really cared
About my Christian family.

But, all of my desires
Could not really be,
Because from this wall of fear,
I had not been set free.

Thank You, Lord, that you are faithful,20191220_195927
And in Your timing, You did see
That I would be delivered from this fear,
And I could claim that victory.

The wall is gone, and God is giving
A freedom to be me.
That wall of fear that was so present
Is now history!

But, since that fear of rejection
Was so much a part of my life,
It is a habit I have formed
That must be severed with a knife.

That knife has gone deep within,
And what is coming out is not pleasant.
But, as I give these fears to God,
He is giving, in return, a present.

20191220_195734

That present is a gift of peace,
And a freedom to love others,
Despite the rejection I may feel
From my sisters and my brothers.

When I see the change that
He has worked in me,
I praise the Lord for all He’s done.
He has delivered, and brought victory!

24 thoughts on “Freedom from Fear

    • Thank you, Bruce. This was written right after I had had that situation with that pastor where he had told me that he thought I had not been crucified with Christ. So, I talked with my best friend, and after about a 2 hour long talk she told me that I had a spirit of fear, which the Lord confirmed, and so we prayed for God to deliver me, and he did.

      But, then all kinds of memories of my childhood and all the abuse I had gone through began to surface, and a lot of that was stuff I thought I had forgotten but not really forgotten for it was just stuffed down inside my heart. And, now it was all coming out and I didn’t know what to do with it.

      I have shared this testimony before, but to make a long story short, the pastor ended up apologizing to me for his false accusations against me and he came alongside me to help me to know what to do with these memories, which, in short, was to give them over to God, not bury them again, and so that is what the poem is about. And, that was in 1982.

      Thank you for your comment. I appreciate it. I believe the Lord wanted me to share it to encourage others who might be battling with fear, too.

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s